Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Yeah, thanks...

Alright, so how much longer were y'all gonna to let me go before you told me I mispelled my own blog's name??!!! Yes, I'm talking to all five of you!! 

Last night, I changed the URL and I realized that the link on your dashboards would then be broken. So, I'm putting my pride aside and mispelling it...again. 

Then I got curious, so here are some interesting things I've learned when I googled "Snuggy":

1. snuggy: A condom. So named because its use implies that the wearer is well endowed (hence, it fits snugly). Oh, man. I was this close to getting laid, but neither of us had a snuggy.
2. snuggy: Another term for a "wedgie" or "melvin" that was commonly used in the '70's, to describe what happens when your shorts get pulled up into the crack of your butt. I hate wearing boxers because they bunch up around my crotch and give me a snuggy.

3. snuggy: Same as a wedgie only lifting up the FRONT of the pants, so the victim's genitalia are suddenly divided & pinched/crushed by his or her underwear, i.e. an acute case of camel-toeThe daring perp must move swiftly to administer a painful snuggy without himself being assaulted.

Also, I found a site that sells Snuggies. The site name and URL are mispelled, and they have a huge fucking picture of the Snuggie box on their homepage!!!

Snuggy hoods - for smart horses....WTF?! 
Check out the Sweet Itch model below...the poor horse...

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Halloween, schmalloween...

Ask anyone, I loooooove Halloween. I’m obssessed with Halloween. Come Labour Day, I can’t stop thinking about it, what is my costume going to be, where are we going, etc. 
Halloween is the only time of year where you get to take on a new persona, let your creativity run free, or buy a slutty costume for 39.99$. It is the one day of the year where women can publicly let out the slut within. Now, after a couple of Pollie’s lessons, maybe I’ll feel more eager to partake. But honeslty, if you can buy it at a Sex Shop all year round, it’s not a Halloween costume! 
I wasn’t sure what my costume was going to be this year, up until the last minute. I was so stressed, this was not like me not to have a plan. I’m the girl with the big ideas, who gets started weeks ahead of time, and helps everyone else with their costume. (I’m not going to tell you what my costume idea was, because I didn’t end up wearing it and I’m planning on using it next year.)
The plans were set: my friends and I were going to see Rocky Horror Picture Show on Friday night, go out partying on Saturday night and have a horror movie marathon on Sunday. A beautiful weekend packed with Halloweeny goodness.  
I have to admit, my mood took a serious dip in the last couple of weeks. The weather, the diminishing sunlight, the anniversary period of a certain breakdown I had some years back.... (Maybe one day, I’ll get into it, but for now, denial works wonders!) So, its a bittersweet time of year for me. Needless to say, I was looking forward to a weekend of distractions. 
Thursday night, I go pick up tickets for RHPS and find out they’re all sold out. While my girlfriends with boyfriends both react the same way, “That’s all right, I’ll spend a nice quiet night at home with my man.” Me, myself and my Snuggie are left with no plans....arrrgggg!! 
And then comes Pollie’s first lesson: “Yo! If you wanna meet men, you have to hang out with people with the same goals.” 
Fine, so last minute, I manage to lift up my spirits just enough to pull a costume together as a 40’s glamour girl. I looked pretty awesome might I add. “This ol’thing?! I’ve had this dress for years!” kinda awesome.  Pollie and I make alternate plans and agree to go to Drama Queen’s office Halloween party. 
But for the life of me, I did not wanna be there. I felt down and anxious, and not myself. I tried my best to have a good time but all I wanted to do was go home and pull the covers over my head. Usually, I’ll have a couple of drinks and get into party mode, but I wasn’t even in the mood to drink, the first sign that there’s something seriously wrong with me. So, as I repeatedly looked at my watch, I also watched Pollie and Drama Queen get drunk. 
And I thought to myself: I can go out, with other single women. But if the basic  ingredient isn’t there, and no it isn’t alcohol, you’re screwed regardless. It’s willingness. 
And it’s been MIA for a while now.  
My Saturday night wasn’t any more eventfull. But I’ll keep that for another post...even though I know y’all are dying to know!

In hommage to Halloweens past, here are some of my fave costumes. Enjoy!

Elvis from Aloha Hawaii, my ultime fave!! I don't fit in it anymore :(

Corpse Bride, the year I broke up with Jerk Off.
My subconscious talking...
Diana from V, 1983 version not the crappy 2009 one

Spring!!! And look how awesome Mel looks!!

Peacock, such a mistake! I couldn't get through doorways!
But the tailfeathers now decorate my bedroom.